Go World

I'm on a Top 10 roll....the Top 10 Things I'd Like to Do Before Summer Ends:

1. SUP...that's hardcore surfer slang
2. Hang a milk jug round my neck to pick raspberries and make homemade raspberry jam
3. Saddle up and reenact the chase from The Man from Snowy River....but I'd settle for galloping through pastures too
4. Tee off a round of twilight golf
5. Paint a watercolor and display it proudly
6. Cheer on Federer at the US Open
7. Take a romantic moonlight stroll over the Brooklyn Bridge
8. Vespa ride to get Teridank
9. Bait, wait and catch a fish
10. Hit up a morning concert....backstreet boys anyone??

I was walking down the street with my new roommate, literally mid-sentence on how safe our neighborhood is, when I felt this thing hit my shoe. It took half a second for me to realize it was a GIANT rat, less than half a second for me to let out a bloodcurdling scream while simultaneously kicking the rat up in front of our eyes. My new roommate was definitely more shaken up than I was....by my reaction, not the rat. When she calmed down and I was still taking deep breaths, she chatted away about mice babies until I reminded her once again, that I don't do rats. NYC is scary for different people, for different reasons.

I feel like dancing in the rain to R. Kelly's "World Greatest". I reached the perfect storm, brewing and churning for quite some time, until it reached a fever pitch. I felt a stress so deep that I closed up entirely, not wanting to talk about it. I do this, go on lockdown when I'm faced with a tough situation (usually that I've created) and I'm so embarrassed of "what if I fail" that I can't talk about it. So the stress builds, and builds and the problem seems so big and so critical to my survival. And I completely shut down my communication (ironic, I know) until I solve the problem. FYI, I'm sharing this experience as a "what NOT to do". With bestie out of the country, I reached the point where I realized I had to tell someone. There was just too much stress. Enter Aubrey, solver of all problems and probably the least judgmental person I know. Plus, she's highly ambitious so she totally gets my "succeed or die" mentality. It completely helped, and she was both sympathetic and gave me great advice. Proving that once again, when you have a problem, don't keep it to yourself.

When you're bad at something, it's good to realize you need help to fix it. I know that how I handle problems, by trying to solve it all by myself, is painful and not at all beneficial. Turning to people to trust, trusting them with my most personal problems is soooo hard. But the more I practice and give in, the faster I get at realizing when I need help and asking for it. By Thursday the problem was mostly solved and on Friday, I felt like I had conquered Everest..."I'm that little Bit of hope, when my back's against the ropes, hey I feel it, mmm, I'm the World's Greatest."

I made it through, and I felt like the whole world celebrated with me. The Olympics kicked off!!! Reminding me once again that life is a team sport, that even when you're competing alone, facing problems alone, the whole world is cheering you on, supporting you. No man is an island. I celebrated with late night golf on the Hudson, trying to imitate Creed's perfect form and laughing when I whiffed the ball just a couple times. Creed is extremely patient, and he helped me out a bit with some good pointers. I made three batches of cookies, quickly becoming my doorman's favorite. I watched the olympics while I painted a "Bob Ross" original. It's now displaying proudly in the kitchen for all to see. It turns out, I don't need to sign up for that watercolor class after all! Thanks Bob Ross.

Mine is the painting on the right

My favorite olympic commercial is the Visa one narrated by Morgan Freeman, pointing out that when an athlete wins, we all take part in it. Join the global cheer. The olympics after all, is a world effort. And as sport often imitates life, whether we win or lose, we are still cheered on to the finish line. "If anybody asks you who I am, just stand up tall, look 'em in the face and say....I'm that star up in the sky, I'm that mountain peak up high, hey I made it, mmm, I'm the world's greatest." If you believe it, you can achieve it. And if you're struggling, don't be too prideful to ask for help :)

Muddy Vistas

My parents are the cutest, I had so much fun with them in Europe. And they're still there, living it up and celebrating my mom's birthday. Like my dad always says "find someone that's better than you are, but dumb enough to marry you." Well he won the lottery, she's not only an incredible mom but an amazing wife and best friend. And together, they make each other perfect :)

In honor of my mom's birthday, today's top 10 is the Top 10 Things You May Not Know About Kelly...

1. She can do the splits
2. She taught wind surfing
3. She still has and fits in the sexy one piece bike outfit she wore at the age of 20
4. She does high kicks/the Freddy dance to ELO's "Mr. Blue Skies", with gusto
5. She speaks fluent spanish, leaves voicemails in french, and finishes my sentences
6. She's played the organ all over the world
7. She makes the best homemade chocolate cake, so famous it sold out in 10 min at the Bullis bake sale
8. She cut her hair as short as Demi Moore in the early 90s
9. She was a dead ringer for Marsha Brady in high school
10. She can be seen in every LDS visitor center in the United States, including Hawaii

My mind is blank. In front of me is a black tarp, water flowing down it, into a pool of what looks like chocolate milk. I turn around and look at Shannon. I'm not sure what I'm saying, but she grins and nods. I think I grin back.

I'm looking at the black tarp again, unsure if I should get a running start, will it scrape my knees?, how hard should I throw myself?, but I'm out of time to think. I don't feel a thing as I hit the tarp, I'm aware of screaming and clapping behind me, and I register surprise as I land face first in the muddy water. Surprisingly warm. I turn around to see Shannon laughing and gearing up for her slide. Then we are both half swimming half slogging through serious piles of muddy slime.

Through the rain we ran, climbing over and under, swimming through giant mud pools and ending the race army crawling through the mud. We got down, we got dirty (seriously dirty) and we crossed the finish line of the DC mud run, victorious.

If I thought I'd finally crash after my race, I was wrong. I was energized, bouncing all over. Jet lag has me convinced I'll never sleep again. Staying up until 4 am to finish a project for work, then several hours later going to race, was just the finale of a week I can only call surreal. As someone pointed out to me, "It only took a European vacation, a week's worth of lacking in sleep, a near all-nighter work project, and running a race to get you tired." I've heard it said more than once that you sleep when you're dead, but I actually am starting to feel a bit piqued.

I had a startling realization this week, thanks to institute. Fill in the blank: "My life will Finally be easier when ____." As we went around the room, I tried to think of my own response. I realized that everything that I've been looking forward to are not easier things. Better, but not easier. If anything, they will make my life more complicated, more stressful, but more fulfilling. My life will never be easier than it is right now, was my realization. We talked about adversity in institute. Why it's good for you. You can't be a diamond if you don't go through the pressure and hard times. I loved this quote:

“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. The fact is that most putts don’t drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to be just like people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, and most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is just like an old time rail journey ... delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.” -Jenkins Lloyd Jones

This week had both vistas, lots of speed, and the delays, sidetracks, smoke and total chaos. I wouldn't have life any other way. My life will Finally be easier when....I accept adversity and challenges that I'm given, knowing that God is there to help me through this wonderful life.

My favorite part about home makeover shows are the before and after photos. Here are the photos of me and Shannon from our DC mud run, enjoy! Oh and P.S...yes I forgot to take off my jewelry and I ran the race in pearl earrings. At least it's a classy touch.

BEFORE......

AFTER.....

Veni Vidi Vici

That's right, it's an all new Top 10. This week it's my Top 10 Observations from France and Italy:

1. Opels are shoddy cars; Opels with whiplash brakes are even shoddier; Opels with whiplash brakes driven like they're a BMW are shoddiest of all.
2. Three women shouting directions manages to disorient and highly stress the male driver
3. Kinder Buenos are cheaper than water
4. The person in charge of directions is a sacrificial job
5. If you have the opportunity to stay in an iconic hotel with garish decor along the French Riviera, Take It
6. When in doubt, go with Croque Monsieur
7. My mother is a gypsy's dream come true (she makes my dreams come true too, for different reasons)
8. Running along La Croisette to the tune of One Direction, makes you feel alive and beautiful
9. PDA is alive and well
10. My name in French sounds infinitely sexier

I really miss nights spent watching "le Tour Eiffel" light up and sparkle, like watching fireworks every night. As anyone knows that's tried to learn a new language, it's difficult getting your brain to switch back and forth between two languages...but that moment, when your brain just transitions with ease and liquidity, is the magic moment. I reached that point just as we were leaving France, and I was so sad to go. I used to think that I wanted to live in France for a summer, now I'm thinking it's an absolute necessity. French people are sooo nice when you speak French, even if you sound horrible. My favorite were the little french kids running around, I seriously can't Wait to bring my kids to the south of France for a summer, arrange play dates and fun outings, and speak French.

Speaking of outings, this trip made me realize that if I ever want to go to Europe again, and rent a car, I haven't a PRAYER of surviving unless I'm bringing a man with me. All of the cars in Europe are manual! Actually, what really alarmed me was the fact that even my dad had trouble driving our crappy euro car. Add in the fact that my internal compass is always pointed 180 degrees from the right direction, and there you have it. Calm men with a good sense of direction, wanted. It was my first time in the south of France and it really is as picturesque as it looks. Shockingly so. Each town is so unique and full of beauty. Don't even get me started on the bakeries...I'd live in France just so I could hit up the bakery every morning. Amazing. We saw some really cool medieval towns such as St Paul de Vence, Antibes and Juan le Pins.

We hit the beaches in Cannes and Nice, hanging out at the beach club and swimming in the clear blue water. At night, I loved strolling along la croisette with the beach on one side, luxury cars on the other, and a light breeze playing in your hair. Then we made our way to Florence, the famous duomo, Ufizzi gallery, old bridge, and became experts in italian leather shopping. Which is another thing, I am Loving Euro style! Good thing I had extra room in my suitcase so I could bring things back. There were adorable children's stores with gorgeous handmade dresses and trousers, another reason to bring my future family to France, so we can all dress european! In Florence, we sat and listened to an incredible organ concert. Hearing the old organs be played in the churches is such a neat opportunity.

Beyond the history lessons, cultural observations and future plans, the lesson that I took away from this past week was more internal than anything. I realized how important it is for families to take trips together, and often. When you travel with your family you learn and practice relationship skills you wouldn't normally practice. On vacation, you learn to forgive easily and often, that it's impossible to stay mad, that everyone has quirks, and that ultimately, the good times far outweigh the difficult moments. Traveling with your family makes you realize that life is not always perfect or super fun 100% of the time, but you forgive quickly, love openly and embrace the positives that everyone brings to the trip. Those, after all, are the fun memories.

Home of the Brave

"Oh say can you see, by the dawn's early light
what so proudly we hailed, at the twilight's last gleaming,
whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight,
o'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming,
and the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
gave proof through the night, that our flag was still there,
Oh!!! say does that star spangled banner yet wave,
o'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave."
-Francis Scott Key

I added emphasis to the "oh" in the star spangled banner like only a true Orioles fan would sing it. I'm happy to say that my volleyball skills are in fact, improving. The only problem is that now, my little five foot four (and 5/7)-inch self is just dying to spike the ball. I keep having these brief yet brilliant hallucinations of me jumping three feet in the air and slamming the ball down on the other side, looks of shock and awe across my opponents' faces as my team showers me with high fives and war cries. Annnnd back to reality.

This week I discovered the amazing benefits of "white noise." My home teacher let me in on this little secret, called "ambience," and let me tell you I've never felt more calm or relaxed. Is it just me or does even the word "ambience" sound soothing?! Try saying it out loud...ahm-bee-ahnce. You feel better already! The sounds of rolling thunder and pitter pattering of rain have been playing as I happily work through my day. I'm amazed I didn't discover this sooner, for years I've used a fan to help me get to sleep, never realizing it could help at work too. There's a great website online that has white noise, so I like to rotate between beach waves, thunderstorms, and underwater dolphins. The underwater dolphins remind me of scuba diving, listening to myself breathe underwater and the sound of bubbles flowing out as I exhale. Namaste.

I finished the Best book this week!! I took so many notes that it took me twice as long to finish it. It's called "The Best Advice I Ever Got," by Katie Couric. Over 200 famous, influential people were asked to share what lessons they've learned in life/what advice they'd give others. Fascinating answers. Some were super long, they involved stories, anecdotes, lists. Others were mere sentences, or as in the case with the founder of Twitter, exactly 140 characters. Since there was no topic or theme, it's interesting to see what certain people chose to write about.

I had so many favorites that it's honestly hard to choose just one, but towards the end of the book I read a couple of unique responses. One was Jay Leno's. Jay was the only person that focused entirely on the subject of....marriage. And not just marriage, but on choosing a person to marry. He said the secret to the success of his 30-year marriage is that he married his conscience.

"I always say marry your conscience. Marry someone who you would want to be, someone who wants to help you be that better version of yourself. In Hollywood and just about everywhere else, you're constantly exposed to greed and pride and flattery and lust, and if you meet someone who likewise succumbs to those vices, well, then, you're just screwed. But if you choose to be with someone who says 'What?! You don't usually act like this. Why are you doing that?' then you have a pretty good chance of staying on the right path."

I love this idea of marrying someone that will keep you in check, recognize your flaws and work with you, not against you, to improve you and become a better person. And vice versa, like a team. I also like to think of this as tough love, because sometimes constructive criticism/help doesn't always go over that well, but it's growth. As I'm learning in my own life, growth can sometimes feel uncomfortable and at times painful. In order to have a relationship like that, I think you have to become good at giving. Mitch Albom, the man who wrote "Tuesdays with Morrie"wrote his response on giving. When Morrie was dying, people came to see him, to say goodbye. Rather than talk about himself, Morrie asked them about their problems, life, and continued to put his focus on them and be a good listener. As Morrie puts it, "Giving makes me feel like I'm living." When you most want to feel alive, the things you gave will be the things that return. Coincidentally, a large number of people- Dr. Oz, Steven Spielberg, Larry King- wrote on the importance of listening.

Lastly, Malcolm Gladwell gave an interesting response called "Don't turn on Your Greatest Asset." He gave examples of how when things go wrong, in moments of crisis and desperation, we often turn on our greatest asset. That asset could be another person, a trait within ourselves, or an object. "That which we do best is the most visible and the most scrutinized thing about us, so it is almost inevitable that when times get hard it's the aspect of our lives that we fixate on-for better but mostly for worse. I've seen relationships falter in bad times, not because they were weak, but because they were strong." I've never quite thought about it like this, but when I look back on crises or difficult moments in my own life, I've often tried to change or eliminate what are sometimes my greatest assets, partly because I got scared. I understand what he's referring to, and he makes a good point. Don't turn on your greatest asset.

It goes without saying (but hey, I'll say it anyways) that I've mastered None of the advice in this book. Not Even Close. On the bright side, it's given me ideas for things to work on in myself. I love having things to work on and improve. I'll post my notes from the book to my other blog shortly, and you can read short excerpts from what each person wrote as their advice. More than anything, I loved this book because it reminded me that no matter what age, what circumstance I'm in, I have the ability to change and to be whoever I want to be. I'm eternally grateful for that agency to choose-- choose to be better, choose to make a difference, and choose to change. Choose The Right. Our potential shifts, changes, grows, lives, within each of us, and it's a wonderful thing.

Passionate

"One person with passion is better than forty people merely interested." -E.M. Forster

Just like the Late Show has a Top 10, here's my Top 10:
Things People Said to me This Weekend...
10. "Do you have a bike? You need to get a bike." (3X) You find me the space, I'll get a bike
9. "We won't touch your feet." Sweaty hot mess of Swedish Twister
8. "Does this hurt??" Try sleeping on a sunburned back
7. "I'm not walking next to your skinny ass"
6. "Hi Lauren, it's Splashy!" Favorite part of my Sunday night
5. "Sacrifice your body!" beach volleyball encouragement
4. "You must be my daughter!!!" halfway across the country, dad and daughter both watching Stage 2 of the Tour
3. "I miss you tons and am sooooo excited to see you next week!!" we couldn't be more alike
2. "Your hair is so Long!" (2X) apparently, my hair is getting super long
And the number 1 thing someone said to me this weekend IS....
1. "Sorry, I didn't recognize you with clothes on." From beach babe to barbecue chic, I have many looks. Apparently.

My true colors came out in swedish twister. It's a game of touching.......Feet. Ugh. It's a flaw that I am pretty good at hiding, I hate other people's feet touching mine. I remember having a huge crush on a guy, for months, and I kept trying to get him hang out with me, one on one. He invited me over to his place, so I showed up with high hopes. I spent the entire time sitting on the couch with his giant hairy feet that he had placed in my lap. Sexy.

I love the word passion. It's exciting, full of energy, possibilities and  hope. It's also, Intense. Intensity, in the right things, can be wonderful. Mmhmm. Like passion iced tea, delicious. You could say my life is pretty passionate. I try to follow my passions, do the things I love. Sometimes it can be hard because I love to do so many things. I recently came across this advice that I LOVED: Write down five things you love to do. Next, write down five things that you're really good at. Then just try to match them up!

Like most things (all things?) in life, for every reaction there is an equal and opposite reaction. You can imagine that if I live my life so passionately optimistic, I also have passionate moments of discouragement. I like to think of life like a boxing ring. The opponent is obstacles, trials, hardships, whatever you're trying to beat. Sometimes, you're killing it, blocking punches, delivering knockouts. Other times, you're getting your butt handed to you on a platter. Looking up flat on your back with the wind knocked out. In between that you have what I call the freak of nature opponents, the ones that you keep hitting and hitting, and you might as well be brushing them with feathers.

In boxing, there's a rest period between rounds, to regroup. Wednesday, I reached that point. I was putting in effort and hard work with nothing to show for it. I didn't feel any bit closer to reaching my goal, after months. More importantly, I felt like a failure, with all of this passion bottled up inside. For over an hour I let it out, to a very sweet and understanding listener. To quote a book I recently read, "I think we cry to release the animal parts of us without losing our humanity." Either because I had nothing else left to say, or I couldn't breathe, I finally stopped. What happened next can only be described as what JK Rowling calls "the fringe benefits of failure." It's incredibly humbling. You face your weaknesses, worries and it's cathartic. It wipes the slate clean, and you start a new round, more energetic and more passionate than before. It worked, I bounced back stronger.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf wrote a great talk in this month's Ensign. I've already highlighted it, taken notes, everything short of framing it on my wall. He talks about life being infiniteless, and to always think of ourselves as being "in the middle." Whatever your goals are, don't worry about whether you are starting, finishing, stuck in a rut, work and act like you are in the middle.

"Yes, there will be moments of beginnings and moments of endings throughout our lives, but these are only markers along the way of the great middle of our eternal lives. Whether we are at the beginning or the end, whether we are young or old, the Lord can use us for His purposes if we simply set aside whatever thoughts limit our ability to serve and allow His will to shape our lives."

"Being always in the middle means that the game is never over, hope is never lost, defeat is never final. For no matter where we are or what our circumstances, an eternity of beginnings and an eternity of endings stretch out before us."

So here I am on a Monday morning, passionately living my life...in the middle. Life is good!

Love,

Lo